It has been several weeks since I found the time to write! Wow... I did not realize how busy I have been. Needless to say, being busy is not always a blessing! But as ridicuous as it has been lately, I am thankful for all that God has brought me through and is taking me to!
I have been fortunate for the majority of my life to have been blessed with many friends. I am sure to some extent my abundance of friends is mostly due to my shy and diminuiative nature... NOT! I have always been pretty much a people person and much prefer crowds to solitude. Don't get me wrong, there are times that I long for the quietness of a solitary deer stand high above the forest floor overlooking a stand of white oaks, but most of the time I prefer the fellowship and comoradare of genuine friendship.
Perhaps it is due to the experience of my ever increasing age, but more and more I am learning that things are not always as they seem. Take friends for instance. I have used the term "friend" very loosely for most of my life. If I knew someone by name and saw them fairly regularly, then I considered them a friend. In keeping with that definition, I currently have and have had many many friends. I noticed the other day on my Facebook page that my "friend" count has grown to over 850. I never realized I had so many "friends"!
But to define a "friend" so loosely only serves to diminish the value of those who are much more than just a casual aquaintance. I suppose we could break our friend groups up into "casual friends", "fun friends", "school friends", "work friends", "friends you dont mind taking advantage of when you need to move something heavy friends", "friends who will always tell you what you wanted to hear but never really tell you the truth for fear of not being your friend anymore friend", and well I guess you get the picture.
In my past I have had many friendships. People that I would have moved mountains for, fought for, and I believe I would have died for. But life throws us curves sometimes. These curves can come from self inflicted wounds or just from the unforseen difficulties of life. It is in these times that friends are not only tested, they are defined. I too walked through a very difficult time a few years ago. I found myself in a state of mind and understanding that I never though I would. I emerged from this trial, stronger, more determined, and my mind and heart in the right place.... focused on God.
I survived this time due to the love and companionship of my wife, and a very few dear friends. The truth of the matter is this, I did not lose a single friend during this time, I just found out who they are. I came to realize that I had invested much of my life and energies into earning the love and friendship of some who would not be able to return that level of committment.
A little over a year ago I began to pray for God to send me 10 men. Men who would become so much a part of my life and ministry here, that our thoughts and desires would be one, and our friendships would be real. I no longer have the time or energy to nurse and foster friendships that are not real, and truthful, and eternally focused. In the last 6 months, God has brought 8 men into my life, and I have come to value their friendship and council greatly. At first glance, some of these men may not register very high on your typical "friend" scale. They have past issues. They have past failures. They have past regrets. But I have never been blessed by a greater circle of friends!
Take a moment to appreciate your true friends. Tell them you love them... and that you are there for them... and that you value them. True friends will be there... no matter what.
Love,Honor,Serve
Pastor Eugene
Saturday, August 7, 2010
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Its the Little Things
Tonight I find myself once again in that strange place between utter exhaustion and endless jubilation. I am happy with all that is going on in the church and in my life, and yet I am tired! There is also a little sadness due to the fact that my lovely family departed for Tennessee today, without me! I have a remodeling project going on with a great Credit Union in Springhill Louisiana that requires my full attention!
So, tonight I return from Bible Study to an empty house. Well... not exactly empty. I do have Jack the garbage eating, toilet water drinking constant companion of faithfulness. (You can read more about Jack in a previous blog entry). Jack is soundly snoring away on his pretty pink princess barbie bed.
I have just begun to appreciate the quietness that will be my house this week. No Pixar movie playing on the TV for the 2000th time. No sound of little girls giggling in the shower together. No sound of my lovely wife scolding Jack who somehow seems oblivious to it while he joyfully eats from the trash can. No sound. Nothing. Utter quiet. Well... Jack is still here snoring. But you get the picture.
It is amazing what you can hear, when there is nothing to be heard. In the stillness of absolute silence, it is possible to hear the faintest of whispers from the heart of God. Yes, I believe that God speaks to us in many ways, but there is something about that still, small, quiet, voice that can only be heard when the "noise" of this life is silenced.
No cell phone. No TV. No radio, or music. Nothing. Just my empty ears and God's full heart. It is in this moment that I find myself longing for conversation with Him. I hear God reminding me how blessed I am. How wonderful my family is, how awesome my kids are. Then, as if I could possibly need a reminder, I see a note. Not a big note. Not a long letter. Just a simple note in the loving hand writing of a 9 yr. old.
"Dear Daddy,
I am going to miss you very much! I will take a lot of pictures for you! We will call you everyday! Love you. Reagan"
It is those little things... those tiny little notes that we receive that truly mean the most. Like a symphony played in perfect tempo and composition, so is God's voice and loving presence when we need Him most. Most of us never stop long enough to hear the music that life is playing for us. God, who we tend to not think about until we need something or have a trial of sorts, wants to tell us how much He misses us, how much He longs to spend time with us, and how much He loves us.
The next time you have more than a few seconds to spare. Turn off the TV. Silence the cell phone. Turn off the radio. Close your eyes for a few minutes... and listen to the orchestra of life as God the majestro speaks to your heart.
Love, Honor, Service
Pastor Eugene
So, tonight I return from Bible Study to an empty house. Well... not exactly empty. I do have Jack the garbage eating, toilet water drinking constant companion of faithfulness. (You can read more about Jack in a previous blog entry). Jack is soundly snoring away on his pretty pink princess barbie bed.
I have just begun to appreciate the quietness that will be my house this week. No Pixar movie playing on the TV for the 2000th time. No sound of little girls giggling in the shower together. No sound of my lovely wife scolding Jack who somehow seems oblivious to it while he joyfully eats from the trash can. No sound. Nothing. Utter quiet. Well... Jack is still here snoring. But you get the picture.
It is amazing what you can hear, when there is nothing to be heard. In the stillness of absolute silence, it is possible to hear the faintest of whispers from the heart of God. Yes, I believe that God speaks to us in many ways, but there is something about that still, small, quiet, voice that can only be heard when the "noise" of this life is silenced.
No cell phone. No TV. No radio, or music. Nothing. Just my empty ears and God's full heart. It is in this moment that I find myself longing for conversation with Him. I hear God reminding me how blessed I am. How wonderful my family is, how awesome my kids are. Then, as if I could possibly need a reminder, I see a note. Not a big note. Not a long letter. Just a simple note in the loving hand writing of a 9 yr. old.
"Dear Daddy,
I am going to miss you very much! I will take a lot of pictures for you! We will call you everyday! Love you. Reagan"
It is those little things... those tiny little notes that we receive that truly mean the most. Like a symphony played in perfect tempo and composition, so is God's voice and loving presence when we need Him most. Most of us never stop long enough to hear the music that life is playing for us. God, who we tend to not think about until we need something or have a trial of sorts, wants to tell us how much He misses us, how much He longs to spend time with us, and how much He loves us.
The next time you have more than a few seconds to spare. Turn off the TV. Silence the cell phone. Turn off the radio. Close your eyes for a few minutes... and listen to the orchestra of life as God the majestro speaks to your heart.
Love, Honor, Service
Pastor Eugene
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Too Old to be So Young
Ok...so I have come to the painful conclusion that I am not the vibrant, invincible high energy youth that I used to be! I quizzed my more intelligent friends on facebook today about the old saying... "something is lost on youth!" There were many interesting answers but the correct one was "youth is wasted on the young."
Oh how I long for the days when I could roof houses all day long, hang out with my friends all evening and still get up the next day and do it all again. I suppose it is as close to being a superhero as I will ever get. Now my days are filled with crawling out of bed having felt like I just got in it. Listening to my knees grind and pop more than a high school pep squad techno dance routine. Putting my years of experience to work at the revered pace of a polka dance at the Senior Center and still going home so tired I cant fix my own coffee, or wash the dishes, or help with the chores. Ok... so that may be stretching it a little but you get the ideal. Yes, it would be easy for me to understand that youth truly is wasted on the young.
But last night was enlightening if not downright intimidating! We had the incredible Go Ministries team (www.goministries.net) at the church. Now for the unprepared let me just give you a quick tutorial. Imagine if you would.... taking a room full of 8 year old boys, giving them each 2 dozen Southern Maid donuts and a 6 pack of Red Bull and standing back to watch what happens next. If you could harness the energy produced by such an experiment you could power all of North America for 3 weeks! But even that amount of energy pails in comparison to the Holy Spirit infused exhibition of pure, unbridled energy that the Go Ministries team brought, shared, and imparted at New Life Center last night.
It was in this high energy environment of youth worshiping before God that I had this thought.... "youth is wasted on the young." But then, it hit me. Youth is not "wasted" on the young, it is God's investment in the young! You see, God knows what he is doing.... and HE chose to give the endless energy and vitality of youth... to the youth. But why? I realized last night why God chose to give youth the energy and the strength to worship with abandon... and dance before the Lord as if they do not have a care in the world.
The reason God gave them this ability is because He knows that they WILL dance and they WILL jump and they WILL worship before Him! Unfortunately, we old folks become to "refined" and dignified to just let it all go. It is sad to even admit that so many of my generation will in fact look down on the youth and consider them foolish and unspiritual. The truth of the matter is that many of these young people are much deeper in the spirit than we have been in many years!
My prayer is that God gives me the insight to see the depth of love that He has for them, and that they have for Him. I pray that I never get so old that I cannot just let go..... or so cold that I cannot just let God! May I humble myself in my own eyes and worship as if no one was looking, sing as if only ONE can hear and dance as if I have just been raised from the dead... because in reality... isn't that what being a believer is all about!
Oh how I long for the days when I could roof houses all day long, hang out with my friends all evening and still get up the next day and do it all again. I suppose it is as close to being a superhero as I will ever get. Now my days are filled with crawling out of bed having felt like I just got in it. Listening to my knees grind and pop more than a high school pep squad techno dance routine. Putting my years of experience to work at the revered pace of a polka dance at the Senior Center and still going home so tired I cant fix my own coffee, or wash the dishes, or help with the chores. Ok... so that may be stretching it a little but you get the ideal. Yes, it would be easy for me to understand that youth truly is wasted on the young.
But last night was enlightening if not downright intimidating! We had the incredible Go Ministries team (www.goministries.net) at the church. Now for the unprepared let me just give you a quick tutorial. Imagine if you would.... taking a room full of 8 year old boys, giving them each 2 dozen Southern Maid donuts and a 6 pack of Red Bull and standing back to watch what happens next. If you could harness the energy produced by such an experiment you could power all of North America for 3 weeks! But even that amount of energy pails in comparison to the Holy Spirit infused exhibition of pure, unbridled energy that the Go Ministries team brought, shared, and imparted at New Life Center last night.
It was in this high energy environment of youth worshiping before God that I had this thought.... "youth is wasted on the young." But then, it hit me. Youth is not "wasted" on the young, it is God's investment in the young! You see, God knows what he is doing.... and HE chose to give the endless energy and vitality of youth... to the youth. But why? I realized last night why God chose to give youth the energy and the strength to worship with abandon... and dance before the Lord as if they do not have a care in the world.
The reason God gave them this ability is because He knows that they WILL dance and they WILL jump and they WILL worship before Him! Unfortunately, we old folks become to "refined" and dignified to just let it all go. It is sad to even admit that so many of my generation will in fact look down on the youth and consider them foolish and unspiritual. The truth of the matter is that many of these young people are much deeper in the spirit than we have been in many years!
My prayer is that God gives me the insight to see the depth of love that He has for them, and that they have for Him. I pray that I never get so old that I cannot just let go..... or so cold that I cannot just let God! May I humble myself in my own eyes and worship as if no one was looking, sing as if only ONE can hear and dance as if I have just been raised from the dead... because in reality... isn't that what being a believer is all about!
Saturday, May 1, 2010
Eyes Wide Open
It is 2:35a.m. and I find myself firmly entrenched in the midnight war, one side longing for the land of blissful dreamy sleep where I am a pro bassfishing, millionaire hunk, and the opposing side determined to prove to this old man that he CAN still function on only 3 hours of sleep in a day! It is at moments like these that I think of the craziest things!
For instance, I was just thinking about how butter sounds so much like the location it will soon permanently reside forever in, after being reincarnated as fat cells. Anyway... such craziness of random thought brought me to remember something my darling Lizzie dropped on us two nights ago.
We were sitting in the living room having just completed the nightly Battle Royal of getting everyone showered, hair combed, teeth brushed, homework finished and argument settled about the necessity of going to school tomorrow.... when Lizzie says "Mommy, I wish we did not have to blink, that way we would not miss anything!" This coming from the child that has never successfully kept her eyes open for a single family picture! I have gotten pretty good at photoshopping eyes on to her face!
After a few moments of laughter by everyone present, I began to ponder the thought. How long is a typical blink, and how many times do we blink in a day? I am sure that plenty of my hard earned tax dollars have been spent by some California graduated, tree hugging liberal to accurately determine this very thing. But to be honest... WHO CARES! Well, aside from Lizzie I would think the list of interested blinkologist would be a pretty elite group.
Anyway, after allowing myself to calm down from the thoughts of wasted government spending and fruitless studies of the Human Eye Covering Kinetic Yielding Excitement Action (that is HECK YEA we all blink for short) I began to think about what we really do MISS in the span of a single blink.
There are many things that can happen in such a short span of time that you would hate to miss, if you knew they were happening! Things such as a distant shooting star, the fleeting glance of a potential new friend, the flight of the hummingbird, or the rising cost of our national debt. Yes, all of these things happen faster than a set of rims disappearing at a Puff Daddy concert!
But then a sobering thought hit me as well. Someday, in the span of a single blink, our world, our lives, and our thoughts will change. 1 Corinthans 15:52 says "...in a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, and the dead will be raised incorruptible, and we shall be changed." Immediately. Without warning. No more time to procrastinate. No more time to labor in vain. No more excuses.
In the span of a single blink, everything we have labored for, lived for, and longed for will be changed and we will either bow in admiration to the Bridegroom we have waited for, or we will bow in fear before the maker of the universe who will judge all of creation! It is a sobering thought to think about.
So I suppose there will be many who will someday agree with Lizzie.... and wish that there was no blink, because when last they blinked.... they missed eternity!
Love, Honor, Service
Pastor Eugene
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Moments
This morning I am having one of those unique and incredible "moments" that we all have but so often fail to appreciate. As I sit here in my living room enjoying my third cup of coffee, having just finished reading the book of Romans, and listening to Jack snore,..... I became overwhelmed with thankfulness for the life that I now live.
It was not all that long ago that I felt as if my life was over, and everything that I had "worked" so hard for was slipping through my fingers. It is amazing how we can sometimes justify our endless drive for more, better, and best while totally neglecting the things that are truly priceless in life. Things like our family, our reputations, our name or more importantly, our salvation. I personally had come to a place where my life had become totally disconnected from the reality of who God had created me to be, and destined me to be. I lived for me. I worked for me. I even ministered.... for me.
When my world came crashing down around me and I found myself in a place of utter despair and brokenness, then He came to me.... and all of a sudden I realized it was never about me. All of my righteousness was as filthy rags before Him. I was nothing more than a sinful hypocrite with a platform of selfish ambition. I came to the place of saying I am not WORTHY to breathe... much less confess Christ.... and to minister... well that was totally out of the question. It was not until I came to that place that I realized my destiny, my worth, and in the process I found Jesus all over again!
Today, as I sit here I am most thankful. My current house is 1/4 the size of my former house... and I have never been happier. The church I serve is 1/10 the size of the last church I attended, and yet I have never felt more useful for the Kingdom. Yes... I am having one of those moments where I am thankful for what is no longer... and most thankful for what is!
Remember to thank God daily for the little things in your life. Remember to ask Him to search your heart daily for the secret sins and finally, remember to give thanks to the only one who can truly bring happiness and fulfilment, Jesus Christ.
Make me hear joy and gladness,
That the bones You have broken may rejoice. Psalms 51:8
Love, Honor, Serve
Pastor Eugene
It was not all that long ago that I felt as if my life was over, and everything that I had "worked" so hard for was slipping through my fingers. It is amazing how we can sometimes justify our endless drive for more, better, and best while totally neglecting the things that are truly priceless in life. Things like our family, our reputations, our name or more importantly, our salvation. I personally had come to a place where my life had become totally disconnected from the reality of who God had created me to be, and destined me to be. I lived for me. I worked for me. I even ministered.... for me.
When my world came crashing down around me and I found myself in a place of utter despair and brokenness, then He came to me.... and all of a sudden I realized it was never about me. All of my righteousness was as filthy rags before Him. I was nothing more than a sinful hypocrite with a platform of selfish ambition. I came to the place of saying I am not WORTHY to breathe... much less confess Christ.... and to minister... well that was totally out of the question. It was not until I came to that place that I realized my destiny, my worth, and in the process I found Jesus all over again!
Today, as I sit here I am most thankful. My current house is 1/4 the size of my former house... and I have never been happier. The church I serve is 1/10 the size of the last church I attended, and yet I have never felt more useful for the Kingdom. Yes... I am having one of those moments where I am thankful for what is no longer... and most thankful for what is!
Remember to thank God daily for the little things in your life. Remember to ask Him to search your heart daily for the secret sins and finally, remember to give thanks to the only one who can truly bring happiness and fulfilment, Jesus Christ.
Make me hear joy and gladness,
That the bones You have broken may rejoice. Psalms 51:8
Love, Honor, Serve
Pastor Eugene
Sunday, April 11, 2010
My life in the Big E
What can I say.. I love my life. I am incredibly blessed to have a great family, an incredible church family, and a wonderful job. But there is one part of my life that I find the most challenging, and at the same time the most rewarding.
My life in the Big E... well it is not exactly the Big Easy I am referring to. Although being me is not necessarily a hard thing to do, give me a clean pair of pants and a job that needs doing and I am there! No... if it were that "EASY" I would not waste my limited brain capacity, blog space or your time to espouse such diatribe. No, the "Big E" I am referring to here, is the vast and incomprehensible Estrogen Oasis that I find myself currently residing in.
As most of you who know me are aware, I am the father of 4 daughters ages 7, 9, 16, 20. Between them and the lovely wife of my youth, I have come to appreciate the finer aspects of survival in the testosterone deprived environment of the domicile I call home! It is a drastic change from the life I grew up in with 3 brothers, no sisters, and a mom who barely survived the various encounters with snakes in the house, dead cardinals in the freezer, and various household treasures that were broken and then meticulously reassembled with superglue, duck tape and bailing wire. (I suppose that is where I learned my trade!)
Don't jump to conclusions... I love my life! I love my family! But strictly for the purpose of survival I have learned to recognize and realign my thinking, my words, and my actions to survive the constantly changing torrent of emotions that are raging through my house! I have learned to tiptoe through the vicarious and dangerous hormone minefield with the same stealth and urgency of a cat walking through a room of sleeping pit bulls!
And yet, despite the constant feeling of being a negotiator in a life or death drama of which pair of shoes goes perfectly with this outfit... I have come to cherish each and every moment that I spend helplessly tossed two and fro in this vast ocean. Like the hugs that I get, when one by one these beautiful daughters of mine come by my easy chair headed to bed. Or the way they will crawl up into my lap and just sit.... noone saying anything... just content to be with one another. And yes, I even love the tension that exists when every strand of dna in the room is aligned against the limited amount of manliness that I can muster in the floral, potpourri lotion scented environment of our home when I suggest we watch something other than a chick flick. Yes... I have learned to appreciate the diversity of life that God has given to me.
It is in this diversity, that i can see the hand of God in my life. In so many ways.... I would not be the man I am today... if it were not for the women that they are..... I would not know how to love as I do... to cry as I need to... to be quiet when I should.... and to just be dad. Thank you Jesus that you brought balance to my life.
Love, Honor, Service
Pastor Eugene
Monday, April 5, 2010
Deviled Eggs and Easter Hams
I love the holidays! There is nothing like the feeling of walking into the home you grew up in, the sound of laughter in every room as family gathers from all around to catch up, to compare illnesses and scars, and most importantly....... TO EAT!
Having been raised as part of the Carroll heritage, I have many times in my life had the distinct privilege of enjoying feasts that would make Paula Deen jealous! Our side of the family has never been short on its ability to cook.... and put together some of the most amazing meals. I too enjoy getting in the kitchen and creating some exotic and unique dish.... but in comparison to the "Holiday" meals... my best creations are no more than a $2.00 lunchable! From salads to desserts, a family holiday meal at the McBride/Carroll household is going to be festive, delicious and plentiful.
And so it was yesterday. Mom amazed us all with a 20lb ham. I did not know that a ham could be that big. Along with the ham was baked beans, corn casserole, asparagus, chicken spaghetti, potato salad, fruit salad, jello salad,.... and enough desserts to open a new wing at the Baylor Heart Institute in Dallas.
But the one thing thing I was most thankful for.... was Aunt Sharron's deviled eggs. Now you may think that I have totally lost it, and I probably have. Give me a minute to explain. Many times I have attended pot luck dinners, church dinners, funeral dinners, and other events. Invariably someone always brings deviled eggs..... but usually by the time I get to the buffet table.... they are all gone! So many times I have looked around... and wondered ... who was the lucky person to get the last deviled egg..... did they not know how much I longed for them!
Enter Aunt Sharron into the picture. Having been raised in the genre of some is good... more is better.... and excess is best.... Aunt Sharron came to the party yesterday..... and made my day!
As usual, I waited and let all the little ones fix their plates. Then all of the teenagers fixed their plates. Then... it was my turn. I headed off to the kitchen hoping to find a deviled egg left to go with the massive ham coronary that was residing on my plate. I cannot begin to tell you how surprised I was to find not only a deviled egg left.... but an ABUNDANCE of them! It was like they had somehow become invisible .... and everyone missed them! I was in embryonic poultry preparation heaven! Thank You Lord... for giving me the desires of my heart.
As I fixed my plate I began to think about arriving in Heaven. Wow... what a day that is going to be. There will be no shortages there. There will be no disappointment there. You see... God is not a God of barely enough.. or never enough. My God is the God of more than enough. I am sure that God will appoint my Aunt Sharron to prepare the "heavenly" eggs in Glory land. There is no doubt that she has HIS secret recipe.
More than anything.... I want you all to remember to cherise the times, the love and the meals that you share with family and loved ones. Make time in your busy schedules to enjoy these times... and last of all.... if Aunt Sharron is not going to be at a family get together... save me a deviled egg!
Love, Honor, Service
Pastor Eugene
Having been raised as part of the Carroll heritage, I have many times in my life had the distinct privilege of enjoying feasts that would make Paula Deen jealous! Our side of the family has never been short on its ability to cook.... and put together some of the most amazing meals. I too enjoy getting in the kitchen and creating some exotic and unique dish.... but in comparison to the "Holiday" meals... my best creations are no more than a $2.00 lunchable! From salads to desserts, a family holiday meal at the McBride/Carroll household is going to be festive, delicious and plentiful.
And so it was yesterday. Mom amazed us all with a 20lb ham. I did not know that a ham could be that big. Along with the ham was baked beans, corn casserole, asparagus, chicken spaghetti, potato salad, fruit salad, jello salad,.... and enough desserts to open a new wing at the Baylor Heart Institute in Dallas.
But the one thing thing I was most thankful for.... was Aunt Sharron's deviled eggs. Now you may think that I have totally lost it, and I probably have. Give me a minute to explain. Many times I have attended pot luck dinners, church dinners, funeral dinners, and other events. Invariably someone always brings deviled eggs..... but usually by the time I get to the buffet table.... they are all gone! So many times I have looked around... and wondered ... who was the lucky person to get the last deviled egg..... did they not know how much I longed for them!
Enter Aunt Sharron into the picture. Having been raised in the genre of some is good... more is better.... and excess is best.... Aunt Sharron came to the party yesterday..... and made my day!
As usual, I waited and let all the little ones fix their plates. Then all of the teenagers fixed their plates. Then... it was my turn. I headed off to the kitchen hoping to find a deviled egg left to go with the massive ham coronary that was residing on my plate. I cannot begin to tell you how surprised I was to find not only a deviled egg left.... but an ABUNDANCE of them! It was like they had somehow become invisible .... and everyone missed them! I was in embryonic poultry preparation heaven! Thank You Lord... for giving me the desires of my heart.
As I fixed my plate I began to think about arriving in Heaven. Wow... what a day that is going to be. There will be no shortages there. There will be no disappointment there. You see... God is not a God of barely enough.. or never enough. My God is the God of more than enough. I am sure that God will appoint my Aunt Sharron to prepare the "heavenly" eggs in Glory land. There is no doubt that she has HIS secret recipe.
More than anything.... I want you all to remember to cherise the times, the love and the meals that you share with family and loved ones. Make time in your busy schedules to enjoy these times... and last of all.... if Aunt Sharron is not going to be at a family get together... save me a deviled egg!
Love, Honor, Service
Pastor Eugene
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